Are You Living Your Dream or Someone Else’s?
So, here we are, deep in a world where every swipe, tap, and double-tap could be the difference between feeling on top of the world or questioning everything. It’s wild, right? We’re so connected today that sometimes it’s hard to tell where our true desires end and where the need for social validation begins. With Instagram, TikTok, and all the rest constantly flooding us with “likes,” comments, and views, it’s way too easy to confuse that buzz of approval with actual happiness. But how often do we really stop and ask ourselves: Is this what I want, or is it just what I want people to see?
The Age of Chasing Validation
Social media has seriously flipped the script on what it means to be successful. It’s not just about living your best life anymore—it’s about making sure everyone else thinks you are too. And that’s where the “performative self” comes in. We start doing things not because they genuinely make us happy, but because they look good to others. It’s a slippery slope, and before you know it, you’re chasing goals that aren’t even yours, all for the sake of validation.
What Really Drives You: Intrinsic vs. Extrinsic Motivation
Here’s the thing: to figure out if you’re really chasing your dreams or just someone else’s approval, you need to understand the difference between intrinsic and extrinsic motivation. Intrinsic motivation is all about doing something because it genuinely makes you happy—like painting just because you love it, not because you want a bunch of likes on your latest post. Extrinsic motivation, on the other hand, is when you’re driven by external rewards—like buying that flashy new car just to show it off, not because you love the drive. When you’re motivated intrinsically, you’re fulfilling your own desires. But when it’s extrinsic, you’re basically performing for an audience.
Are You Chasing Fulfillment or Validation?
So, how do you know if you’re more into showing off than actually enjoying life? There are a few telltale signs: Do you feel a bit empty even after achieving something big? Are you always comparing yourself to others? Do your decisions lean heavily on what’s trending online? If any of this sounds familiar, you might be more driven by the need for validation than you think.
Getting Back to What Really Matters
It’s time to hit pause and reconnect with what truly makes you happy—regardless of what anyone else thinks. Start by reflecting on the things that bring you joy, totally independent of outside opinions. Mindfulness can be a game-changer here, helping you tune into when you’re acting out of a need for validation. Set goals that really resonate with your core values, and maybe try cutting back on social media a bit to avoid getting sucked into the comparison trap. And hey, celebrate your wins in private sometimes, just to remind yourself of the intrinsic rewards.
Living Authentically: The Ultimate Power Move
Here’s the truth: when you start living authentically—doing what genuinely fulfills you rather than what looks good to others—you’ll find a deeper sense of contentment. Suddenly, the approval of others just doesn’t seem that important anymore, and your life starts to reflect who you truly are, not just what you want people to see. So take a moment today to think about your recent goals. Are they really what you want, or are they shaped by the need for validation? Reconnect with what truly matters to you, and start living a life that’s yours, not one shaped by someone else’s expectations.
If this hit home for you, share it with a friend who might need to hear it too. And hey, if you’ve got thoughts or your own experiences to share, drop a comment—I’d love to hear what you think!